I woke up today, and my husband told me about the Colorado man who shot up the movie theater during a showing of the Batman movie “The Dark Knight Rises.” We watched the Today show wondering how and why that man hurt so many innocent people. It is quite disconcerting to fathom the thought of so many innocent victims losing their lives at the hand of one mentally disturbed man. Sometime later today, I overheard someone saying, “He (James Holmes) is not crazy, he just had a mental breakdown from the pressures of obtaining his PH.D.” I shook my head in disbelief. While it is true that most people experience some form of episodic mental illness as adults (anxiety, Attention Deficit Disorder, depression, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), the majority of mental disorders appear during childhood. No one wants to be the one to give or receive such information, but in this case – ignorance is not bliss. At the tender age of 25, this man thought the solution to “his problems” was to kill innocent movie goers on a Thursday night. How delusional must he have been to think that you are really "The Joker?" Did he exhibit any warning signs? How long was he feeling stressed or depressed? Why didn’t he reach out to family and friends for help?
After watching the Today Show, I was wondering why I
was thinking about Batman and butterflies? As a child, I read plenty of Batman comic books, watched that Batman TV show starring Adam West, and even watched the Saturday Morning Cartoon. I've always been fascinated by the metamorphosis of the butterfly - growing and changing so drastically. What do Batman and the butterfly have in
common? They both can change their physical appearance, live solitary lives, and help
make the world a better place. More specifically both Batman and caterpillars
climb because they can’t fly, caterpillars go into a chrysalis to change into a
butterfly and Bruce Wayne goes into an underground cave to change into Batman.
Batman’s mission is to fight crime to make the world a more beautiful place,
and the butterfly’s mission is to pollinate flowers to make help make the world
a more beautiful place. Isn’t it ironic that Batman fights crime without
weapons that kill, yet this young man decided to use GUNS to kill people
enjoying a Batman movie? Mayor Bloomberg is requesting that President Obama do
something to regulate the accessibility and purchasing of guns. However, it’s
not the gun that is the problem. Clearly the problem is the person carrying the
gun, because guns don’t load and shoot by themselves. Asking our President to get rid of
guns on the streets is like asking a Doctor to cure cancer with a Band-Aid. While
it is important to deter the use guns and violence as a means to resolve problems, it's
equally important to get people and children help for mental issues before it
gets to the point where innocent people lose their lives.
Today
children aren’t medically diagnosed with mental illness until age 7. If a child
isn’t walking or talking before age 7, they get help from a team of medical
professionals immediately. So why is it so difficult for children to get the
same level of assistance for mental issues? As an educator, I witnessed
countless cases where children and their families were left to “deal” with
undiagnosed mental issues. Today Pediatricians, Psychiatrists, Psychologists, Social Workers, and child study teams are so apprehensive about telling parents
that there may be need for some concern about their child’s mental abilities
out of fear of law suits and “labeling” the children. It is much easier to put
every child under the “politically correct” umbrella diagnosis of “Autism
Spectrum” further fueling the notion that we (as a society) are all the same,
than it is to tell the parents the truth. As an educator I was reprimanded by
the child study teams and school administrations for telling parents, “Your child is experiencing difficulties
(bonding with caregivers, accepting change with ease, playing with other
children nonviolently, regulating emotions peacefully, dealing with separation
anxiety), but we will do everything we can to assist you in your efforts to get
him the best treatment plan possible at this time. “ It was so disheartening to
see the children floundering unsuccessfully through a school year, and the parents
suffering with feelings of hopelessness and failure.
Just like
Batman and the butterfly we (as a society) need to make changes - changes in
the way we perceive, diagnose, and treat mental illness. No child, teenager, or
adult should feel ashamed or ignored if they have mental challenges. We as a parents have a responsibility to look
after the physical as well as mental health of our children. We as a society
have a responsibility to make sure children, teenagers, and adults have access
to mental, dental, and health care services no matter their economic level. We can learn a lot from Batman and
the Butterfly – change is what we all need at one time or another to make our lives better and more beautiful.
If there is one thing the Aurora, Colorado “Dark Knight Rises” Shooting has taught
us, is that change can happen in a flash – or a blink of an eye. Make sure your
loved ones know how much you love them. Pick up the phone and call your mother
and father every day – better yet go visit them once a week if they live nearby.
Give your kids a hug and tell them you love them every morning. Find new ways to show
your husband/wife your love and kiss them before bed every night. Unplug your
family from their iPhones, iPads, and Wii games, and connect with them on a
more personal level. Do you know what your husband, wife, and children are
doing, thinking, feeling? If not, get up out of that chair and find out how to take better care
of them today. If time or scheduling conflicts are an issue in your house, make the family
dinner table your "family sharing time." Make the "family dinner" and "family sharing time" a mandatory event in your house (most nights). All
it takes is one step at a time – turn off the TV and turn on the conversations with every member of your household. Have you ever heard the saying, “you can never be too loved, too rich, or too thin?” Go
out every day and spread your love around, and help make this world a better,
more beautiful place for us all.
When I see a beautiful butterfly flying around carefree, it reminds me of my ability to give love to all – family, friend, and
enemy. Fly Butterflies Fly. I can't wait to see "The Dark Knight Rises" in the movie theater. Will you go see Batman too? If so, let me know what you think of the movie? Let's do this. Here we go!
